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What shocked me most was how rarely stories like mine are discussed. There’s endless talk about pleasure, empowerment, and readiness—but almost nothing about preparation, communication, or the fact that bodies don’t always behave predictably. Complications are labeled “rare,” as if that makes them easier when you’re the one living through them.
I started educating myself. I asked questions. I spoke openly with doctors instead of pretending I understood everything. I learned that pain isn’t something to push through. That bleeding isn’t something to ignore out of embarrassment. That trust and consent don’t replace knowledge and care.
I began sharing my experience—hesitantly at first, then honestly. I was stunned by how many friends had their own stories, quieter maybe, but still filled with confusion or fear they’d never voiced. We’d all been taught how things were “supposed” to happen, but not what to do when they didn’t.
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