The Closet
Elton is gay. Or bisexual. He’s not even sure. But he knows he’s attracted to men, and in the 1970s, that means hiding. Lying. Constant fear of exposure.
Being Elton John onstage means he can be flamboyant, theatrical, excessive. But offstage? He has to be careful. Can’t be seen with the wrong people. Can’t admit the truth.
In 1984, desperate to be “normal,” Elton marries Renate Blauel, a German recording engineer. The marriage lasts four miserable years. It’s not Renate’s fault. It’s not Elton’s fault. It’s a lie they’re both trapped in.
They divorce in 1988.
The Spiral
By the 1980s, Elton is addicted to cocaine and alcohol. He’s using heavily, performing while high, spiraling into chaos.
He’s also bulimic—binging and purging, hating his body, using food as the one thing he can control when everything else is out of control.
He’s the biggest star in the world, and he’s destroying himself.
In 1990, Elton hits bottom. Friends stage an intervention. He checks into rehab.
Gets sober. Starts therapy. Begins the hard work of figuring out who he actually is when he’s not high, not performing, not hiding.
Coming Out
In 1990s, Elton comes out publicly as gay. Not with fanfare or a press conference—just honesty. Interviews where he tells the truth. No more lying. No more hiding.
In 1993, he meets David Furnish at a dinner party. They start dating. It’s the first relationship where Elton doesn’t have to hide.
In 2005, when UK allows civil partnerships, Elton and David register. In 2014, when UK legalizes same-sex marriage, they marry.
They have two sons via surrogate. Elton, who thought he’d never have a family, has a family.
Now
Elton John is 77 years old. He’s sold over 300 million records. He’s won Oscars, Grammys, Tonys. He’s in the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame.
His final tour—the Farewell Yellow Brick Road Tour—ran from 2018 to 2023, spanning 330 shows across five years. He retired from touring to spend time with his family.
But his story isn’t just “talented boy becomes star.”
It’s: Talented boy who didn’t fit found a partner (Bernie), changed his name, hid his sexuality for decades, nearly destroyed himself with drugs and bulimia, got sober, came out, and finally—at fifty—became himself.
The glitter and costumes? Those were Elton John—the persona that gave Reggie Dwight permission to be extraordinary.
But it took decades to reconcile Elton the icon with Reggie the human. To stop hiding. To be gay openly. To be sober. To be a husband and father.
The name change wasn’t just about becoming famous. It was about becoming someone Reggie Dwight was never allowed to be: bold, flamboyant, unapologetically himself.
At 20, Reginald Dwight was a nobody living with his mom.
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